Friday, February 11, 2011

Unlikely Ownership Candidate Of The Day: Hosni Mubarak

  • Suddenly has lots of free time
  • Has vowed to bring the Winter Classic & Super Bowl to Citi force if necessary
  • Looks a little like Lt. Mauser from the Police Academy 3: Back In Training
  • Will not be swayed by the fans or media, not even if they bring torches and pitchforks
  • Current status as the world's most hated man makes the Wilpons look like choir boys

  • Is not a big fan of bloggers or the internet
  • Is a big A-Rod fan
  • Still hasn't figured out that whole "human rights" thing
  • Would most likely try to convert the Mets into a soccer team
  • Once tried to trade the Sphinx to Chad for a golden Bentley
  • Has vowed to have any fans or media saying anything negative about the team "silenced"
All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow me on Twitter @readtheapple

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