Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Unlikely Ownership Candidate Of The Day: Tom Cruise

  • Scientological approach to treatment of injuries can't be any worse than what the Mets are already doing
  • 4 Words: Cole Trickle Bobblehead Night
  • Mets will have a cool 80's Kenny Loggins soundtrack
  • Will manage one game a year as Les Grossman from Tropic Thunder
  • Mandatory pre-game oiled up volleyball match
  • Much like the Mets, hasn't been all that good since the 80's
  • War of the Worlds
  • Will limit GM's ability to play hardball with agents by going on Oprah and shouting how much he loves player X
Gives me an excuse to do this:

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow me on Twitter @readtheapple

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