Friday, February 4, 2011

Unlikely Ownership Candidate Of The Day: Tyler Perry

The phones continue to ring off the hook here at The Apple with calls from fringe candidates wanting to throw their hat in the Mets ownership ring.  Yesterday, we profiled Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis' bid.  Today we fielded a call from someone a little more reputable: the man who basically runs TBS these days, Tyler Perry. 

Thanks in large part to an endorsement from Oprah, Tyler Perry has risen to fame and fortune with his his TV shows and films like Diary of a Mad Black Woman, House of Payne, I Can Do Bad All By Myself and the soon to be released Madea Goes To Gary, Indiana.

Perry told The Apple that he has no interest in meddling with the job of the GM.  "My goal is to boost the entertainment value of the TV broadcast. I would leave the player decisions to Sandy.", said Perry.  "I want to revolutionize the way baseball is broadcast on TV.  Make it more episodic and introduce new characters.  Maybe a sassy Black uncle or possibly K-Rod's father-in-law."

In addition to comedy the new Mets TV broadcast would also deal with more serious issues ranging from personal responsibility to teen pregnancy.

Mr. Met would also be joined by a second mascot, Madea herself.  A spokesperson for Mr. Met told The Apple that Mr. Met would welcome the move as he "has always had a thing for Black chicks".  We didn't have the heart to explain that Madea is played by a man.

Much like Joe Francis, Tyler Perry doesn't stand much of a chance of becoming the new owner of the Mets with one big exception.  Should Oprah become involved all bets are off.  Personally speaking, I think an Oprah led ownership group might just be what we need to finally get the Mets back to the top. 

To paraphrase Chris Rock, "She may not get us to the mountaintop, but she'll get us to the playoffs."

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow me on Twitter @readtheapple

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