Thursday, March 10, 2011

ReadTheApple.com Founder Goes On Drunken Bender After Being Blocked By MLB Twitter Account

Sparks were flying yesterday at the offices of The Apple when founder Randy Medina discovered that the site's Twitter account had been officially blocked by Major League Baseball's Twitter account.  According to Larry Smith, Medina launched into an expletive filled tirade and spiraled into a full on bender of Sheentastic proportions with the first two porn stars he could find.

According to sources, Major League Baseball became upset when Medina would humorously change their tweets and "retweet" them with a satirical spin.  This led to his being blocked by the MLB, an action which is pretty much has no consequences.

This didn't stop Medina from calling into the Dan Patrick Show and laying into the MLB commisioner:
“There’s something this side of deplorable that a certain Allan Huber Selig — yeah, that’s Bud’s real name — mistook this rock star for an easy target, bro. Check it, Dan: I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world by healing at a pace that his unevolved mind cannot process.”
The MLB then countered by releasing this statement regarding The Apple's phony re-tweets:
Congrats to The Apple, that was the blockomatic tweet. Never fake-RT. We blocked him w/out a 2nd thought.
This apparently only served to anger Medina more:
"The MLB is saying "Don't be special, be one of us." Newsflash! I AM special and I will never be one of you."
When asked about why he is so confident that he will come out on top of this dispute:
"I'm a Mets fan.  I've taken more punishment than anybody could survive… I was bangin’ seven-game collapses and coming back for more because that’s how I roll, because I have one speed, one gear. Go. I’m different. I have a different constitution. I have a different brain. I have a different heart. I got Mets blood, man. Winner Winner Apple Dinner!"
 Medina then climbed to the roof of his office building and waved a machete for a few hours.

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow me on Twitter @readtheapple

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