Valdespin Returns To Action With Slight Uniform Alteration

Monday was a rough day for Jordany Valdespin. First he was drilled in the tender vittles by a fastball and then ripped by his manager for not wearing his protective cup.

"Right out of the hand it’s like, ‘Oh, [bleep]! That is right at his [genitals].’ ”

-Tigers Pitcher Justin Verlander

On Tuesday, the Mets hottest hitter returned to camp sporting some new equipment mandated by manager Terry Collins. According to the Mets skipper, Valdespin will have to wear the full body cup "until he stops acting like an enormous [genitals]."

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow me on Twitter @readtheapple.

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