Monday, July 26, 2010

Apple Placed Under Armed Guard After Disastrous Road Trip

On Monday, members of the NYPD and U.S. Armed Forces gathered in front of Citi Field to discuss security.  But this was no terrorist threat or Presidential visit.  For the near future, they are here to protect "The Apple". 

When we say "The Apple" we don't mean this crappy blog but the actual Home Run Apple from which it got it's name.  Apparently, after the debacle on the West Coast, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg contacted Mets management about protecting one of NYC's newest landmarks and cherished symbol of Mets fanhood.

Apparently, Hizzoner had become concerned after listening to some sports talk radio this weekend.  He explained his fear as he addressed the gathering of security forces this morning.  "The Apple is a cherished piece of many New Yorkers lives.", said Bloomberg.   "Right now there is a lot of anger out there.  Mets fans are not thinking clearly and are capable of anything.  Our job is going to be to protect them from themselves and prevent them from doing something they may later regret."

The Apple will remain under guard until further notice.  So far there has been only one incident when a popular NY sports radio host tried to eat it.  The man was taken into custody and the Apple was not harmed.  Officers confiscated his bottle of Diet Coke.

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story.

2 comments:

  1. hey we both know that the radio personality with the diet coke has never ever eaten an apple before.

    ReplyDelete
  2. He heard it was filled with nacho cheese.

    ReplyDelete

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