Let's face it. Mets attendance has been on a down slope for a few years and the current edition of the team - have you noticed a decided lack of outfielders(?) - figures to continue the trend.
Since the club knows that their promotional dates do increase attendance, at least a little, they are scrambling to find more give aways and people to honor.
Here are three new promotions just announced by the team's crack PR department:
APRIL 28th "See Wheeler and D'Arnaud in action day"
No Mets fans, these two highly touted prospects will not be on the Mets at this time and won't be at CitiField even if you will be. But the Las Vegas 51's (no offense but is that really a great name for a team from that city? How about the Rolling Crappers?) have a home game scheduled that afternoon vs Tacoma while the Mets will be finishing up their "game" with Philadelphia on that Sunday afternoon.
Once the 51's' game starts it will be showed in its entirety on the big scoreboard. Actually they'll stop showing the game when D'Arnaud and Wheeler are both removed from the game.
Get your tickets now to see the future stars for the Amazin's.
MONDAY MAY 29th "Jay Horwitz Bobblehead Night"
What do you do when you've bobbleheaded all of your regular players? You move on to the more cuddly people in the front office. At first it was thought that Fred or Jeff Wilpon would be good candidates for a bobblehead night. But the thought of thousands of the torn off heads being tossed onto the field dissuaded the powers that be from going in that direction.
Since no one dislikes the plucky PR director for the team it is expected that the stands might be close to half full when this giveaway takes place.
WEDNESDAY July 3rd "Jason Bay - bygones night"
The Mariners do not play the Mets this season (we demand an investigation into that. The Mets need to play all the doormats more often) but that's no reason to not honor a guy who tried real hard while delivering the team virtually no value over his three cursed seasons as an Amazin.
As part of the pregame program the team planned to retire Jason’s #44 in perpetuity (thinking it was likely jinxed). But that plan has been scuttled given the fact that the current #44, one John Buck, is vying for the National League lead in RBI’s.
The new plan is just to award Bay an Amway franchise on his special evening.
All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Follow Larry on Twitter @dr4sight.
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