Mets Look To Capitalize On Good Start By Adding New Promotional Dates

Let's face it.  Mets attendance has been on a down slope for a few years and the current edition of the team - have you noticed a decided lack of outfielders(?) - figures to continue the trend.

Since the club knows that their promotional dates do increase attendance, at least a little, they are scrambling to find more give aways and people to honor.

Here are three new promotions just announced by the team's crack PR department:

APRIL 28th  "See Wheeler and D'Arnaud in action day"

No Mets fans, these two highly touted prospects will not be on the Mets at this time and won't be at CitiField even if you will be. But the Las Vegas 51's (no offense but is that really a great name for a team from that city?  How about the Rolling Crappers?) have a home game scheduled that afternoon vs Tacoma while the Mets will be finishing up their "game" with Philadelphia on that Sunday afternoon.

Once the 51's' game starts it will be showed in its entirety on the big scoreboard.  Actually they'll stop showing the game when D'Arnaud and Wheeler are both removed from the game.

Get your tickets now to see the future stars for the Amazin's.

Mets Go All-In On Controversial New Citi Field Tenants

You've probably already heard that one of the Citi Field storefronts will be occupied by an Amway store.  Amway has had a bit of an image problem over the years being called by some a pyramid scheme. Some Mets fans feel like their team has been a pyramid scheme at times over the years so perhaps the union is not so far fetched.

The Mets expected a violent storm of protest over the new Citi Field occupant and there has been some negative publicity but it has not been unmanageable.

So since this seems to be working out, the Mets have moved on and have announced the names of the three new tenants near the Amway store at Citi Field.

One is the headquarters of the American Communist Party.  Just so you know that the Wilpons have some scruples, do be advised that before allowing this fringe group to have a spot near Citi Field the team emphatically turned down the application of both the Nazi and Fascist parties. One does have to draw a line somewhere.

Move Over Moneyball, Mets GM Invents Dinnerball

The Mets, the masters of looking like they're ready to do SOMETHING and never really doing anything, have topped themselves recently. Perhaps they fell into this by design or maybe it was just dumb luck. In any case it has evolved into a plan that will go into high gear next off-season.

The internet is buzzing over the fact that recently Sandy Alderson had a dinner with super-agent Scott Boras and one of his high profile clients, OFer Michael Bourn.

Now we serious Mets fans know that there is no way in H-E double hockey sticks that the Mets are going to shell out big big bucks for a free agent outfielder. They'll have one of their classic excuses at the ready.  Here are just some of them.

The Apple Presents: A Mets Fan Survey For Smartasses

Nowadays you can't surf the internet for more than 10 minutes without being surveyed and polled.  You'd think that with the Presidential election being over that it would stop but it just moves on to some other subject. Heck, the Mets even used an online poll to decide if they should move Banner Day. With that in mind we've put together our own Mets-related poll. 

Please answer the following questions honestly and remember that your answers will help shape...well nothing really, just like every other internet poll.

Mets Players Share Their New Year's Resolutions

"I resolve to make everyone forget Travis D'Arnaud, Josh Thole, and that other guy (you know, the one with the hair) whose name I have forgotten already." - JOHN BUCK

The 12 Days Of Metsmas: A Crowdsourced Mets Christmas Carol Day 9

Day nine of Metsmas brings us a gift from Milo Krimstein via Facebook.

On the ninth day of Metsmas, my ball club gave to me...

Lil' Murph's Diary: Murph Gets Married

Dear Diary,

Your friend Daniel is no longer a happy-go-lucky single ballplayer but rather a married one.  Tori and I tied the knot about a week ago. So now I'm adjusting to married life.

The wedding was a lot of fun and I had a few of my Mets teammates there for support. Ike was there and so were Ruben, Josh Thole, and of course, my longtime buddy David Wright.

Lil Murph's Diary: The Dark Murph Rises

Dear Diary,

I guess I should title this entry: "I'm good but we suck."

It was a horrible weekend for our Metsies as we managed to lose all three games to the Dodgers.  It's almost like every team has returned from the All Star break except us.


But for me personally I'm on a tear.  The ball looks grapefruit sized again (thank goodness) and I had a heckuva series vs LA except for one error I made.  I had four hits on Friday and another four on Sunday.  On Saturday I didn't start vs the lefty Capuano who I think was on our team last year but that was so long ago.

Mets GM Alderson Issues Bizarre Organizational Mandates For Second Half

The following letter has been found in the home clubhouses of all the NY Mets' minor league teams.

ORGANIZATIONAL MANDATES   -  effective JULY 12th, 2012

Hitters -

Please be advised that due to the big league's team lack of righthanded hitting we are putting a moratorium on batting lefthanded.

All lefthanded batters will cease batting lefty (an exception being made for when the opposing pitcher is right handed).

In other words, all lefties must become righthanded batters or switch-hitters.

Pitchers -

Any pitcher carrying an ERA above 4.50 must report to their respective pitching coaches for knuckleball instruction.

Those who show an aptitude for the pitch must also clear their offseason schedule since much of it will be taken up by a mandatory climb up Mount Kilimanjaro.


All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story. Story by Larry Smith. You can follow Larry Smith on twitter @dr4sight   

Lil' Murph's Diary: With Great Mustache Comes Great Responsibility

Dear Diary,

Well I have to admit it. Your friend Daniel Murphy is in, what they call in baseball slang, A HITTING SLUMP.

It's no fun to admit it, but my batting average, which is used to being well over .300, is now around .270. I still have no home runs and just feel lousy as can be at the plate.

When I'm going normal the baseball looks like a nice big grapefruit and my bat feels like a wide paddle that has no problem smacking it squarely.  Nowadays that ball looks like a tiny grape coming at me at 90 mph and it's like I'm trying to strike it with a #2 pencil.

Las Vegas Sportsbook Takes Enormous Hit During Dickey 1-Hitter

Wednesday night saw baseball history made and almost made.  Matt Cain pitched a perfect game for his SF Giants while R.A. Dickey came really close to pitching a no-hitter (ho hum, another one) for the NY Mets.

But the sports book at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas saw little money change hands on those accomplishments.  Instead it was an exotic combo bet that nearly sank them.

Lil Murph's Diary: Jose's Return and Two Guys Named Stanton?

Dear Diary,

Well it's been a weird couple of days here in Mets-land so I figured I would catch you up on what's happening.

Mets Owner Fred Wilpon Was Inspiration For NBC Alternate Reality Drama "Awake"

NBC has a new show airing on Thursdays called Awake. The premise being that the main character can not tell whether he is asleep or awake.  He lives in two alternate realities since suffering a terrible accident.  In one his son is dead, in the other, he lost his wife. This much you may know. What you may not know is that the idea for this show came from the fact that Mets primary owner Fred Wilpon has the exact same situation going on.

Lil' Murph's Diary: Little Murph Is Ready For Spring Training

Dear Diary,

It's been a while since I've written so I thought I'd catch you up on what's happening.  Soon we'll be heading down to Florida to start to get ready for the 2012 Major League season.  This is about the first time I'm going down there with a position, sort of.

An Obituary For Mets Hopes

In Memory of

METS HOPES (1962-2011)

After a long lingering illness, Mets Hopes died in Queens New York in December of 2011.

Lil' Murph's Diary: I'm A Trade Rumor!

Dear Diary,

This is a special week in offseason baseball.  Mr. Alderson and some of his helpers have flown out to Texas to take part in the Winter Meetings.  While other stuff is done I suppose, the winter meetings seem to be all about signing players who are free agents and making trades.  There are a gazillion reporters and bloggers out there so trade rumors come flying out of that area like nobody's business.

Caught On Tape: Fred Wilpon & Sandy Alderson Discuss Strategy For 2012

"Sandy, we're phasing out color to cut costs."

In case you're wonder the bug we planted in Fred Wilpon's Citi Field office is still functioning fine.  Here's what it picked up a couple of mornings ago:

Many Mets Players Blissfully Unaware Of The Existence Of Post Season Play

The other day THE APPLE assigned me to cover a charity luncheon at a downtown Manhattan hotel.  It was a grand event which featured active and retired players from the major sports and hockey.

I had a chance to hobnob with some of the legends of their respective games.  I must say my hobbing is really coming around but my nobbing is still a work in progress.

When it came time for the actual meal I had the choice of sitting at a table with NY Knick greats like Walt "Clyde" Frazier, Kenny "Sky" Walker, and Bernard "I forgot to have a nickname" King or sit with some of the present Mets players at an adjacent table.  I, of course, sat with the Amazins.

SNY Renews Kevin Burkhardt But Cancels The Mets

It is October, a time when TV networks realize that their brilliant ideas of just a few months ago have turned into shows that nobody really cares about.  Ask the folks at "The Playboy Club" and Hank Azaria's amigos at "Free Agents".  They have been pink slipped already. (Wait, is that a pun regarding the Playboy show?)

The Apple has learned that due to failing ratings during the 2011 baseball season, sports network SNY has decided to discontinue carrying games in the upcoming 2012 season.

Lil' Murph's Diary: Little Murph's Last Diary Entry Of The Season

Dear Diary:

Well the 2011 baseball season is over for the Mets (it was over for me a long time ago but you already knew that).  We didn't make the playoffs, we didn't finish over .500, and for sure we didn't stay healthy.  I guess it was another "didn't" season.

But the news isn't 1000% bad.  Our boy Jose (Reyes of course) won the National League batting championship.  Good for him. Someone told me that no Met has ever done that before.  Betcha that if I'd stayed healthy I coulda given Josie and Braun a run for their money but, well, you know....