The people living under styrofoam heads or P.L.U.S.H. Unit was originally established by the U.S. Army with hopes of proving that Mascot Americans could fight side by side with Human Americans. As it turns out, they couldn't. You see mascots don't talk, which makes it impossible for them to give orders. Also their huge heads make an easy target on the battlefield. Despite the fact that the unit lasted only two weeks, bonds were formed that have lasted through the decades.
On Sunday night, Mr. Met got together with Bernie Brewer for a quiet meal at a Milwaukee restaurant. The Apple was invited. Speaking through an interpreter who can translate mascot gestures, Mr. Met and Bernie Brewer fondly recalled their time in the service.
Not all the memories were fond however as the two recalled the mascots who didn't make it back. Mascots like Dandy who was slated to become the Yankees mascot until he was killed in a tragic training accident involving a prototype t-shirt cannon. The Yankees would later reveal a new "Dandy" in the 1980's but would quickly scrap the idea out of respect for the memory of the original Dandy.
We left that dinner on Sunday with a new found appreciation for Mr. Met, Bernie Brewer and that little known Army unit from the late 1960's, but mostly we found it amazing that anyone could make sense out of these two mascots crazy gestures.
Happy Memorial Day.
All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. Memorial Day however is very real. For more information and ideas on how to observe the holiday, please visit http://www.usmemorialday.org
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