Three Mets Taken Into Custody At Arizona Airport

Several Mets players got a first hand look at Arizona's controversially strict immigration laws today when the team arrived in Arizona.  Upon arrival at Sky Harbor Airport, Mexican players Rod Barajas and Oliver Perez were taken into custody along with suspected Mexican Henry Blanco.

"It happened so fast.", said Mets 3rd Baseman David Wright. "We were getting ready to get our bags and then we got swarmed.  Next thing you know they got Ollie, Hank and Rod."

The move didn't exactly catch all the Mets by surprise.  The Mets had sent Johan Santana directly to L.A. to avoid this trip while some other Latino ballplayers such as Alex Cora and Frankie Rodriguez were smuggled into Arizona inside equipment bags.

The players taken into custody were quickly released with the exception of Perez who, at the request of the Mets, was kept for additional screening.  Arizona immigration officials insist they have done nothing wrong.

The players involved have different opinions of the situation.  Barajas, an outspoken critic of the law, was outraged and sees this as another example of why change is necessary.  Blanco, however, is used to this and offers a different opinion.  "When you look like me, you get used to being stopped.  I get stopped everywhere.", the Venezuelan catcher told the Apple.  "I once got frisked in the dugout at Citi Field by stadium security...in the middle of an inning."  Blanco was stopped for questioning 3 more times on the way to the team hotel.  

Oliver Perez however had the most interesting take on the whole thing.

"The coffee in the interrogation room was free.  So that was nice.", said Perez.  "But mostly, it's just nice to be wanted...by anybody."

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story.

Barajas "Injury" Caused By Excessive World Cup Celebration

Rod Barajas has sat out the last two Mets games and the story keeps changing.  First it was his difficulty catching R.A. Dickey and then yesterday the Mets announced that Barajas had a sore back.  Just a regular symptom of the wear and tear a catcher faces throughout a grueling 162 game season?  We didn't believe that either so The Apple did some digging and have gotten to the bottom of the story.

After checking around, The Apple has uncovered this photo of Barajas taken on Tuesday afternoon after Mexico had officially qualified for the World Cup round of 16.  Because the team had already banned the World Cup from the clubhouse, Barajas was out watching the game with some friends and Mexican soccer fanatic Jay Horowitz.  Apparently at some point during Barajas celebration he tweaked his back, taking him out of the lineup and leaving the Mets short one catcher.

Horowitz originally denied the story but when confronted with photographic evidence, he agreed to tell his side of the story to The Apple.  "It was after the game and we were all feeling pretty good.  Mexico had lost but South Africa's victory over France put the Mexican squad through anyway.", said Horowitz.  "We were getting pretty rowdy and then Rod attempted one of those soccer celebration slides like Landon Donovan did vs. Algeria, but landed awkwardly on his keys and wrenched his back.  It didn't seem like anything at the time but by the time we got to the ballpark it was starting to stiffen up."

Barajas is not expected to miss much time with the injury and the Mets have said he will face no disciplinary action because the incident took place under the supervision of Horowitz.  One thing is for sure though, between clubhouse shenanigans and vuvuzelas, the Mets will be glad when the World Cup is over.

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story.

Mets Ban World Cup From Clubhouse After Brawl

Earlier this month Adam Rubin reported on espnnewyork.com that the Mets have a World Cup pool going on in which every player adopts a nation in the World Cup with the winner receiving an undisclosed prize.  The Apple suspects that prize is not an Oliver Perez bobblehead.

Well apparently, the friendly spirit of competition seems to have gotten the better of some of the Mets players prompting the team to ban all further World Cup games from the clubhouse.  Additionally, the Mets have banned all discussion of the games for the duration of the cup.

It seems on Sunday, Jeff Francoeur and Rod Barajas were involved in a minor brawl after yesterdays game in Baltimore.  The source of the arguement? You guessed it.  The Slovenia/Algeria contest.  Francoeur who has adopted Slovenia reportedly got a little too cocky with Barajas, who is represented by Algeria.  Some pushing and shoving ensued and eventually escalated into punches being thrown.  No one was seriously injured and the two reportedly settled their dispute amicably but judging by their comments, The Apple suspects there may be some lingering hard feelings.

"The guy is a sore loser.", says Frenchy.  "Robert Koren took them to school plain and simple.  Rod just can't handle that."

Barajas sees it differently.  "He's trashing Chaouchi, but it wasn't his fault.  It was a defensive breakdown by Belhadj that really led to the goal.  Frenchy doesn't know anything about soccer."

Officially, the Mets brass has asked the players to cancel the bet but the word around the clubhouse is that the wager will continue quietly.  Francoeur however is not being quiet about anything.  Standing by his locker, waving a miniature Slovenian flag and sporting a black eye, Frenchy could be heard shouting, "Slovenia baby! All the way!"

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story.

Breaking News: Barajas "Calls In Sick" To Cincy Finale

The Mets will be using the old "day game after night game" mantra, but the Apple knows better.

A source close to the Apple informed us this morning that when the Mets take the field this afternoon for their rubber game against the Reds, it will be without catcher Rod Barajas.   Barajas, who hit a go ahead solo homer in the ninth inning of last nights Mets victory, has reportedly called in sick to observe the Mexican holiday of Cinco De Mayo.

Though born in California, Barajas has always felt an intense pride for his Mexican roots.  Last year he played for the Mexican national team in the World Baseball Classic.  We tried to contact Barajas to confirm his unavailability for today's game but when we reached him on the phone it was clear that he had already begun "celebrating" the holiday and most of what he said was unintelligible, though we are pretty sure we heard something about Arizona in there somewhere.

With Barajas out, the Mets will turn to Henry Blanco to take over the catching duties.  Blanco, who most fans believe is Mexican, is actually from Venezuela and has no problem playing today.

In another report, it is rumored that fellow Mexican Oliver Perez will also be taking the day off.  We tried to confirm this, but we couldn't find anyone who cared.

All articles featured on The Apple are fictitious. No Mets were harmed in the writing of this story.